your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
