I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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