So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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