Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
