Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize