LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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