Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Someone shattered a urinal.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
