# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
