This girl is more easily done than said...
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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