I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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