Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
