awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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