You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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