No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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