Well apparently he's into motor boating.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
