So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
