I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
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