goodnight i made you a song goodbye
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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