being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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