Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
