he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
