chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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