Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize