the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize