her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
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