he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
