goodnight i made you a song goodbye
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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