We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
We talked him into tasing himself.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
