This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
