You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
