I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
