Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
