Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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