Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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