they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
