Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
