I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
