id be glad to
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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