do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
