I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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