Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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