I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
