Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize