Jerry, you need to find god
lets start a swedish sibling band together
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
