grandma shit on top of the toilet
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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