I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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