Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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