I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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