Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Randomize
