she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
