I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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